Terrorism Signs

Posted by subby
April 19, 2008



In the months following 9/11, there was a big information push from the US Government about being more aware of terrorists/terrorism, and what to do to avoid terrorist actions. One of these information portals was the site http://www.ready.gov. Below are some actual images from the site during this period (I can’t find them there anymore). Here are some possible interpretations as to what they might mean…


If you have set yourself on fire, do not run


If you spot terrorism, blow your anti-terrorism whistle. If you are Vin Diesel, yell really loud.


If you spot a terrorist arrow, pin it against the wall with your shoulder

If you are sprayed with an unknown substance, stand and think about a cool design for a new tattoo.

 

 


Use your flashlight to lift the walls right off of you!

The proper way to eliminate smallpox is to wash with soap, water and at least one(1) armless hand.

 

 


Michael Jackson is a terrorist. If you spot this smooth criminal with dead, dead eyes, run the hell away.

Hurricanes, animal corpses and your potential new tattoo have a lot in common. Think about it.

 

 

Be on the lookout for terrorists with pinkeye and leprosy. Also, they tend to rub their hands together manically.

 

 

If a door is closed, karate chop it open.

 

 

Try to absorb as much of the radiation as possible with your groin region. After 5 minutes and 12 seconds, however, you may become sterile

 

 

After exposure to radiation it is important to consider that you may have mutated to gigantic dimensions: watch your head.

 

 

If you’ve become a radiation mutant with a deformed hand, remember to close the window. No one wants to see that shit.

 

 

– If you hear the Backstreet Boys, Michael Bolton or Yanni on the radio, cower in the corner or run like hell.

 

 

If your lungs and stomach start talking, stand with your arms akimbo until they stop.

 

 


If you are trapped under falling debris, conserve oxygen by not farting.


If you lose a contact lens during a chemical attack, do not stop to look for it.


Do not drive a stations wagon if a power pole is protruding from the hood.

A one-inch thick piece of plywood should be sufficient protection against radiation.

 

 



Funny

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